Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
