thus making me awesome and them whores
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Someone signed my nipple.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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