i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
