Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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