Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
