Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
