So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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