I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize