i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize