so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
