I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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