garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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