I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
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