I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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