I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
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