and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I can't turn off my feet"
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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