Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
