we're blogging at a bar
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
