Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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