I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
