ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize