the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
