i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
