Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Randomize
