Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(757): View more from Virginia

Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town

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(210): View more from Texas

Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight

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(952): View more from Minnesota

So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building

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(509): View more from Washington

I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(361): View more from Texas

As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.

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(440): View more from Ohio

uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober

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(281): View more from Texas

I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."

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(516): View more from New York

YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia

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