You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I just found puke in my bra..
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
