plz talk dirty to me
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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