i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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