I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
