i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
