only if we run a train.
done.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
