Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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