wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
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