No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize