Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize