youre lurking in front of me
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize