With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
