I CAN MOONWALK!
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Randomize
