How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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