I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
