party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
