Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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