wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
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