So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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