That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
