I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
