im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I would ride that face into the sunset
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
