Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
