That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
organizing the empties. That sober.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
my poor anus
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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