Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
