seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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